Here’s the thing about trans kids, and nonbinary kids especially:
We know we’re just kids. We KNOW we’re not going to be the same ten, twenty years from now and maybe that means our genders will change, maybe not. Who knows maybe when in 15 years I’ll look back and think “geez how silly was I to want to be called fae.” Maybe I won’t.
But why does something that hasn’t happened yet matter when I’m alive right now, and this is who I am right now? My 30 year old self shouldn’t factor into this. Right now this is me and this is what I need. The world is vast and changing and nothing ever stays the same but that doesn’t stop people from giving themselves what they need right when they need it. Yeah, I’m a kid and I’ll change. Everyone changes as the grow and learn, and everyone does thing they regret, but experimenting and figuring out who you are is part of growing up and becoming an adult. My gender is part of who I am, no matter how much it changes through my life, and I’m not less worthy of your respect just because I’m at a stage in my life where I’m still getting to know myself. I’m growing up and learning who I am. I’m changing and the way I express my gender and the way I label it and the pronouns I use aren’t necessarily going to stay the same, but who cares? Right now this is who I am, and my future self doesn’t exist yet.
So if I look back 15 years from now, maybe I’ll think my pronouns were silly when I was 15, but I think I’ll be glad that I was able to try things and get to know myself, because I’ll know myself so much better because of that.
As somebody who was into shamanism, greek orthodox, wicca, paganism, etc for a time when I was a teenager (as a means of reconciling my desire for spiritual fulfillment whilst never having been raised Christian), yeah, this is actually a SUPER important point
Teenagers do a lot of weird sh*t as they start becoming and rationalizing and forming an identity of themselves, and it is REALLY important to foster that kind of identity-formation because it’s one of the few points in your life that you can try out different identities like different outfits every single day, without recourse
So, yeah, I apologize for acting really dumb about those animal-themed pronouns etc a few months ago… I’ve learned better and I don’t think y’all should bully people about it, either. Let’s be at LEAST as good as our livejournal elders were to us in the early 2000s, if not better
I wanted to reblog this again while adding my thoughts. I definitely agree with the OP and Shelby’s commenary. I don’t talk about this much, but I identified (not openly) as genderqueer for a while when I was in my late teens. I also thought I was trans for a good chunk of my adolescence. Looking back now at 22, I understand why I felt those things and while I still feel in similar ways, I don’t really identify as anything other than just “queer.” I guess that makes me cis because I’m okay with being a woman/female/idk/I don’t feel dysphoria hardly ever anymore. I’m not really sure?
What I guess I am trying to say is that was what I needed at the time to survive, when I was really confused and lost, and everyone else deserves the same right. I mean who cares. Especially with sexuality, which is so fluid. It doesn’t matter what you identify as now or five, ten years from now. You don’t have to stick with one thing. Things change over time. I wish I had understood that when I was 13/14. Coming to terms with my sexual identity would have been a lot easier. I think the same thing goes for gender, and honestly who cares if you change your mind a lot over the years? Honestly, the more you distress, fuck with, tamper, and deconstruct gender, the better in my book.
I know being a teenager is one of the worst feelings in the world, especially being a queer teenager. Love yourself, stay true to your convictions, and respect others. The rest will follow through, I promise.